It can be very difficult to adopt a headspace where you can tackle negative feelings head-on and use them as learning tools. Here, we investigate some of the underlying circumstances and traits which can lead one to feel fraudulent, and suggest some mechanisms to productively manage these negative self-perceptions.

Dealing with Isolation

Living with the angst and fear of being ‘discovered’ can be a very isolating feeling. This isolation is compounded for graduate students who spend a significant amount of time working alone, or tackle brand new ideas with few mentors to offer guidance. Often, graduate students work for months before receiving feedback, and even when feedback is received, it may not be highly structured, i.e. it is not a grade derived by following a rubric. This is the nature of graduate work; however, many students are accustomed to having a clear measure of their performance prior to graduate school. For many of us, undergraduate grades and detailed feedback may have been ways by which we measured our deservedness, and may have even contributed to our self-worth. Therefore, it can be difficult to measure our level of competence in this new unstructured environment. It may be reassuring to learn that you are not alone - the majority of us have felt this way at some point in graduate school. You may find it beneficial to reach out to fellow graduate students to express your feelings of isolation and self-doubt. It is also imperative to remember that your self-worth is more than the validation you receive from your academic performance. As described by Seaborne (2020),

Carving out time to feel more prepared in uncertain situations will immensely help dispel feelings of undeservedness. Sometimes half the battle is knowing how to find the resources you need to succeed in a new environment - and fortunately for us, our graduate training has equipped us to do just that. Try conducting literature reviews or taking short courses to boost your skills (LinkedIn Learning can be an excellent - and free - resource!). If you’re feeling stuck, sit down and make a plan. Putting your goals and feelings onto paper will clear your mind of internalized stresses, while also creating a resource to refer back to whenever you need to check your progress. 

It can also help to seek targeted feedback in uncertain situations. This feedback can come from your supervisor, your peers, or an expert in your field. When looking for feedback, start by identifying specific skills which need improvement, as opposed to general feelings of negativity. Once you’ve pinpointed these skills, you can approach trusted individuals to ask them for targeted suggestions. For example, many graduate students feel out of their depth when giving presentations or leading classes, and can benefit from obtaining specific advice regarding slide content and/or presentation style. The MacPherson Institute on campus offers teaching support for all graduate TAs; they can even visit your classroom to provide honest and constructive feedback on your teaching performance. Asking for outside opinions can be very validating, as we are most critical of our own actions - your perceived inadequacies often aren’t visible to others. It can also help break the cycle of internalized negativity about your performance/skills, and instead redirect your thought patterns and resources in a productive way.

Dealing with Perfectionism

Graduate students tend to be high-achieving individuals with an innate tendency towards perfectionism. Often, perfectionists struggle with feeling that their perceived mistakes make them unworthy or inadequate. However, it is important to realize that making a mistake is not a failure. Instead of seeing your mistakes as evidence of inadequacy, try to reframe them as learning opportunities - making a mistake can often help you learn more effectively than if you were to do everything perfectly the first time. We can also take some guidance from the field of engineering when struggling with perfectionism, as one Neuroscience graduate student explains: 

The tips we’ve mentioned above may help you start a journey by which you learn how to actively change your mindset long-term. However, sometimes a ‘quick fix’ is necessary to stop negative self-perceptions in their tracks. Next time you’re feeling overly critical of your abilities or progress, try one of these tips:

• We’re often so much harder on ourselves than we would be on others in the same situation. To reframe your negative thought patterns, ask yourself, “If an undergraduate student came to me in this situation, what advice would I give them?” Focus on ways to encourage ‘the student,’ make them feel comfortable, and bring out the best in them - then turn this advice right back on yourself.

• Evidence-based approaches have shown that three affirmations per day can combat anxiety and negative thought patterns. Affirmations can take the form of statements such as, “I am proud of my ability to handle (a particular situation where you felt tested and challenged),” or “I am proud of (a small or large personal victory).” Reminding yourself of your resilience and your past successes can boost your confidence and help yourself feel deserving of your current status.